Lil' Unicorn is getting pissed off! (photo) - $1
This is a funny advertisement I stumbled upon on Craigslist a while back. It was too good not to save. It's a tragic tale of an unwanted imagination boosting stick unicorn. Awwwww? Poor little unicorn. Nobody wants him.
Note the difference between this and Xydexx, the pony that everyone wants.
Date: Thu Aug 8 17:02:02 2002
My feelings are so
hurt! I tried to be nice and made a plea to your common sense on how
I am a great imagination boosting stick unicorn. I know you
are letting your children rot their brains out sitting in front of
some sort to idiot tube playing video games or watching TV. But no!
You ridicule and mock me. You've offered to let your dog chew
me up and have wanted to know if I am flammable, but you still
wouldn't come and get me. Someone wanted to know how big my
horn is. It's 9" and almost 4" wide at the base which is big
enough for whatever the heck you had in mind!
At one dollar you
better buy me pretty soon or I'm going to have a self-esteem
problem. I'll end up at the dog parks tormenting the dogs who can't
jump high enough to get me but when they aren't looking are going to
feel my horn up their butts. I'll visit children's windows at night
and scare the daylights out of them and rumors of the mystical
haunted Unicorn will travel throughout the city. I'll steal their
Pokemon and Yugio cards and eat them. I'll leave mystical
Unicorn crap on their Playstation machines. I'll tinkle on their
Power Ranger dolls. In the end I'll set myself on fire and and fling
myself into an arcade parlor engulfing the entire
So buy me or
It's NOT ok to contact this poster with services or other commercial interests or the Unicorn will eat you.
This Unicorn lives in or around Golden Gate Heights.
This is in or around Golden Gate Heights